My blogs are writings from my perspective of personal and observed experiences. There are no right or wrong answers or choices. There are only experiences and our chosen manifestation of how we perceive those experiences. It is important that we understand life is full of choices and experiences, whether we are responsible for 90% or 10%, BE responsible!
Recently I found myself addressing the pain of my inner child, who resides in my adult body. As a Life Coach I understand many of us have experienced this topic from different perspectives. As Beings, we are born into this world, perfect. Maybe not perfect from society's standards but perfect from The Creator's standards. We are perfectly made for the job we were created to do. No matter how small or great.
After birth we were given to our parents, who believed they needed to mold us into a perfect being of their specifications and creative talents. As we grow we add our own creativity to the mixture, which includes our peers' perception of who we are, or who we should be.
By adulthood we are confused and conflicted. We don't understand why. We then take another 20 years to unravel the chaos to find out we were perfectly made from birth. When we were knitted together in our mother's womb. Our core character was implanted in us at conception. There was no need for the fine tuning from our human creative sources. All we needed was nurturing and living examples of universal truths. Parents who are the tangible expressions of truth.
We are born into this world designed to "BE" the "BEING" we were/are created to be. Hence the word "BEING". Not "doing". We are not designed to DO. We are designed to "BE". When "being", doing is a natural byproduct. Just as breathing is a natural byproduct of living.
Parents often focus on their children's "behavior"(be-acting). Children learn to become actors and wear masks, on the stage of life. We never see or get to know who they are, their true essence. The Being their Creator meticulously carved them to be.
It seems as though parents raise their children to be "little mini me(s). Hurt, confused children in an adult body. Many parents transpose their pain, anger, mishaps, and disappointments (of self, parents, experiences, broken promises, broken hearts, etc) into their children. Because of their inner turmoil, the children are not seen as the unique beings they are. Children are seen from the negative perspectives/beliefs the parents have of themselves. This process is called "Mirroring" or "Transference."
We come into this world as blank slates. Our Caretakers write on these slates, and the result can be creative chaos. Since, we can only recreate what has been experienced.
This is the legacy I've seen most often. Adult children living in adult bodies while retaining their inner child, "To Be" their original selves, before the added unnecessary, parental "BLING".
"Train a child according to his way; even when he grows old, he will not turn away from it."
Due to the misunderstanding of the definition of parenting there is a phenomenon called "The Inner Child." People, who are physically adults although they present emotionally as children. These adult children are confused, angry, and rebellious. Many are stuck in the "terrible twos" while society wonders why?
This Topic: To Be Continued.
The goal of these writings are to lead you to ponder, not to anger......
Beverly D'Amico RN, MSN, CGRS
Certified Grief Recovery Counselor
Certified Fresh Awareness Facilitator
Beverly@TheHeartofWhatMatters.com https://www.TheHeartofWhatMatters.com 770-896-3871
If this resonated with you and you would like to explore more. Reach out for a free 15 minute consultation.